Monday, December 26, 2011

Not-So-Little LEGO Man

Never mention the words "toys", "sexy", and "man" in the same sentence when you talk to Santa. You never know what he might bring you!

Friday, December 2, 2011

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

New release! Got wishes? TIT FOR TAT is now available from Purple Sword Publishing!

Humorous erotic romance
from Purple Sword Publishing

Tate Truer's reality series as a survivalist in wild and uninhabited locales is about to have its plug pulled unless Tate can find a way to re-energize it.  He gets his wish in more ways than he imagines when he manages to dredge up an ornate bottle from the ocean floor. A bottle that contains a tiny woman, a genie, who is eager to grant his every desire as long as he grants hers first.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

I Have a New Publisher and a New Contract!

I'm thrilled to announce that I have a new contract and a new publisher! Purple Sword Publishing will be putting out my next book entitled "Tit for Tat", a humorous erotic fantasy. More information to follow, so stay tuned!

Tate Truer's reality series as a survivalist in wild and uninhabited locales is about to have its plug pulled unless Tate can find a way to re-energize it.  He gets his wish in more ways than he imagines when he manages to dredge up an ornate bottle from the ocean floor. A bottle that contains a tiny woman, a genie, who is eager to grant his every desire as long as he grants hers first.

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Got Matches? Light My Firecracker is now available!

Just in time for the Fourth of July!
Now Available!

Light My Firecracker
(Tales of the Blakeney Sisters, Book 5)
A humorous erotic paranormal romance
Available from Red Rose Publishing

Once upon a time, there lived a man with five rambunctious daughters. They were an average American farming family except for one minor detail. The man was a warlock, and all of his daughters were witchlets—half witch and half human.

It was the Fourth of July, and Amberly Blakeney knew her time had come to find her heart's call. The last thing she expected was to discover that her new love harbored a secret that could jeopardize their future happiness.

To make matters worse, when her father learns Matt’s secret, he refuses to let Matt and Amberly have their Happily Ever After.

Will he be able to do whatever it takes, humanly or magically, to keep the young couple apart?

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

It's official! I have 2 more best sellers!

Many, many thanks to everyone who bought Spank My Valentine and Pet My Easter BunnyValentine is currently #2 for Red Rose Publishing over at Fictionwise.  And Bunny hit the Top Ten list on the RRP website!  Whoohooo!

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Got Eggs? New Release! Pet My Easter Bunny


Pet My Easter Bunny
("Tales of the Blakeney Sisters" Book 4)
A humorous, erotic, paranormal romance
by Carolyn Gregg
from Red Rose Publishing

Once upon a time, there lived a man with five rambunctious daughters. They were an average American farming family except for one minor detail. The man was a warlock, and all of his daughters were witchlets—half witch and half human.

Rast Clemmons is the most arrogant, opinionated, and snobbish son of a bitch Penderly Blakeney has ever met. The fact that he is also her new boss only makes matters worse. With Easter and her birthday just around the corner, Penderly knows beyond a doubt that her heart's call works at the seafood plant. It's only a matter of time before she discovers who he is, and they seal their future together with the sex hex test. But first she has to get rid of Rast Clemmons, who is quickly becoming a major pain in the ass. Regardless of the outcome, that man has screwed up her life for the last time, and now she's ready to call for magical reinforcements.

(:)  (=)  (#)  (*)

The need to talk to her sisters, to have them around her at this time of need, was too overwhelming. They had always been there for each other whenever one of them was distressed. But they're involved now in their own families, in their own lives.

Wrapping her arms around her shoulders, Penderly bent over and sobbed, rocking forward and back.

Penny. My angelic Penny.

She gasped at the sound of the comforting voice breaking through her misery. "Daddy?"

Come home.

"Oh, Daddy..."

Come home.

Somehow she managed to stumble back up the slope to the seafood plant. Bypassing the office, she went straight to the parking lot where the micro minibus was located. She doubted anyone would come looking for her if she was missed. And even if someone did, once they found out she'd last been seen in Clemmons' office, they would assume there had been a tiff regarding her job, and that she'd left in anger.

For once, Penderly was glad for the excuse.

She drove back to the farm to where her father was waiting for her on the front porch. Unlike past events when each daughter arrived home to face congratulations for finding her heart's call, Penderly fell sobbing against her father's broad chest. Amy was waiting inside to guide her over to the couch when they entered the living room.

They waited for the normally stoic Penderly to bring herself under control before Manderly spoke.

"Sometimes the course of love does not run smooth."

"No shit. You think?" Penderly shot back.

Amy kept her arms around her sister, providing the comfort she knew her sibling needed. "Tell us about it," she urged.

They already knew about Rast Clemmons, having heard her rant about him ever since the man first showed up and began decimating people's lives.

"He called me in." She took another deep breath to calm herself as she wiped her eyes with the tissue that magically appeared in her hands. Blowing her nose, she felt a lot calmer, yet inside she felt the insane need to go back to the plant and literally throw herself back into the man's arms. Even now she could still feel the hot, soft press of his mouth on hers.

"He called you in to fire you?" Amy asked.

"No. To reduce my hours."

"Tell us about the egg," her father said, and Penderly managed a small smile. Her father would know about the egg, even if they'd never told him.

"Remember me calling and asking you about the boiled egg in my lunch sack?" she reminded her sister. "Well, when I was in his office I saw an empty container from The Cauldron, and it was like...I was like this light went off in my head, and I could feel my whole body grow numb. I asked him what he'd eaten for lunch, and he mentioned a boiled egg...with orange and green swirls in the yolk."

"Like yours?" Amy said.

"Mine was all blue. No swirls."

"What made you certain?" their father continued.

"When he grabbed me. I think I was on the verge of passing out when he jumped up from his desk and came over to keep me from falling. It was..." She hugged herself as the memory of his touch returned—the need to snuggle against him, wrapped in his cotton-soft warmth, enveloped in his tender care.

And then there had come the fire, searing through her like a match sparking to life as his kiss reached all the way to her womb. Penderly pressed her thighs together as her body shuddered in reaction.

"You kissed," Manderly stated.


"And then you knew," Amy whispered.

"I think I've known from the start. I sensed...I sensed he worked at the plant, but I thought he might be someone I'd known for years, like Sandy and Grant. Or maybe he was someone new to the plant, like a new worker on the docks." She slowly shook her head. "I never thought..." The tears started again. " me. How can I hate a man and desire him, too?"

Thursday, March 10, 2011

New Release! Rhythm and Boos, an erotic paranormal romance

Rhythm & Boos
Humorous, Erotic, Paranormal Romance
Red Rose Publishing
(ebook) ISBN# 978-1-4543-0033-5
Word Count: 13K

Sensuelle (aka Sydney Shookerman) was an exotic dancer. At least, she tried to be. Unfortunately, Sydney sucked at the job. She had a body to die for, and the face of an angel, but she lacked the timing and moves which would put her in the pro league.

Fortunately, she managed to keep her job at Napoleon’s nightclub. And despite the rumors that Napoleon’s used to be a speakeasy back in the 1920s, and was reputed to be haunted, she never knew how haunted it was until she accidentally awoke the spirit of one poor victim from that era.

The first thing Frankie Nuwurth wanted to do was to get even with the wise guys who had put him away. Although he had no idea how he was resurrected, the cute half-naked dame working in the joint was an awful temptation. And one thing was certain—he hadn’t been laid in almost a hundred years, which meant he had a lot of catching up to do!
"Lady, you got a great pair of hooters, but you can’t dance worth shit."

Sydney Shookerman, aka "Sinsuelle", paused in the middle of her dance to stare at the inebriated customer sprawled across his tiny table. He continued to stare up at her with bloodshot eyes. The flashing lights lining the perimeter of the stage made the man’s sweat sparkle in rainbow colors. Seeing that he had her full attention, he saluted her with his bourbon and tonic, and tossed back the last swallow.

The big bass beat pounding from the overhead speakers reminded Sydney she was already behind on her choreographed moves. Quickly, she tried to resume her undulations around the two-inch brass pole, but her heart was no longer in it. Guys were always trying to sweet talk their way into her pants. Customers were expected to cop a grope. The last thing she’d expected was to be told how bad a dancer she was.

The guy at the end of the dance floor was a regular. Mossman? Mosser? Sydney shook her head as she swivelled her hips. No matter. He was a regular every Thursday night. Same table, two bourbon and tonics straight up. But up until tonight, she had never known the man to speak to the dancers. At least, not to her.

The music ended. Sydney froze with her thighs spread, the required "open crotch" money shot. Someone whistled in appreciation of the view. Maybe another three or four clapped. Hurrying backstage, she passed Ophelia, on her way out to do her cowgirl number.

"Good luck," she tossed at the woman. Ophelia snorted, pasted a smile on her face, and stepped through the fiberglass beaded curtain as the refrain to Deep in the Heart of Texas began playing. Sydney always got a kick out of that. Ophelia was from Milwaukee. There wasn’t a single Texas thing about her. Not even the costume. But the woman had a grand old time pretending to ride her six-shooter.

"Hey, Syd."

Mary Ellen gave her a nod as she entered the dressing room. The kohl-eyed woman was busy braiding her hair.

Sighing, Sydney dropped into her chair and kicked off the spiked heels. Her legs looked terrific in the damn things, but they were killers to dance in.

"Hey, don’t get comfortable. Beejus wants to see you."


"Yeah, now. And he’s in a pissy mood, too, so don’t screw around. Better get it done and over with."

Crap. Just my luck. "Thanks, girlfriend."

Mary Ellen nodded. "Good luck. Hope it’s not bad news."

Rather than slip her shoes back on, Sydney chose to go barefoot. If the boss wanted to see her now, and he was in a pissy mood, she was not about to take the time to slip out of her costume first.

B. J. Toomey ran Napoleon’s, but he didn’t own it. In fact, none of the girls who worked there knew who the real owners were, although Sydney sometimes wondered if Cash, the bartender, had some knowledge.
B. J. stood for Barlow Jessup, but he went by B. J. But one Halloween night about three years ago, he pulled a prank on Donna, a girl who used to work at the nightclub, and nearly sent her to the hospital. She later said the creep had nearly scared the bejeezus out of her when he’d come running into the dressing room, dressed in a mask and fatigues, and brandishing a real live chainsaw. Ever since then, everyone referred to him behind his back as "Beejus".

The boss’s door was closed. As per his instructions, a closed door meant important business, so rather than just walk in, she knocked. A moment later she heard a voice telling her to enter.

Toomey was on the phone when she let herself in. He motioned for her to close the door as he finished his conversation. Sydney immediately didn’t like the look he gave her after he hung up.

"Have a seat, Syd. How ya doin’?"

"Fine, thanks. What’s up?" She sat on the edge of the faux leather chair. If the man was in a foul mood, but attempting to be civil, it couldn’t be good news. She braced herself.

"Oh, not much." The man leaned forward over his desk and clasped his hands together on the pad. "I was watching you do your gig tonight." He paused, and she was almost tempted to prod him.

You watched me and..."I overheard Mr. Mossley’s remark to you."

Mossley! She knew it had to start with a moss-something-or-other. She almost patted herself on the back when Toomey’s next comment blind-sided her.

"You know, sweetheart, the man’s right."

She locked eyes on him. "What?"

Toomey shook his head. "You got a great set of tits on you, but your dancing sucks big time. In fact, you’re probably the worst dancer we got. Sorry, sweet chops, but I’ve seen dogs humping that put on a better show."

She could see the ax getting ready to drop any minute now. He couldn’t fire her! He couldn’t!

A million memories paraded by. Foremost was the fight she’d had with her stepdad, which was the reason why she had left her small town for the big city right after high school. She could no longer live at the house with him there, and trusted she could somehow make it on her own. Unfortunately she had no legitimate skills, no training, and no college. Hell, she barely had a high school diploma! What was she gonna do if she was let go? She barely made enough money now to afford anything other than the rent, the utilities, and a little food, much less lessons or classes. It had been by sheer luck she’d gotten hired on at this nightclub when she did.

"No, Mr. Toomey! Please, don’t let me go! I need this job!"

She almost considered dropping to her knees to beg, when the man grinned and waved off her pleas. "Hey, now, now. I didn’t call you in here to fire your ass. In fact, I want to offer a solution."

It took her a moment to grasp what he was saying.   "You’re not firing me?"

"Shit, no. At least, not in the way you’re thinking. You got a body to die for, Sydney, and the face to go with it. Men come in their pants just looking at you. But God didn’t give you the genes to be a dancer, baby. I’m sorry, but I’m taking you off the pole."

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Now Available! Spank My Valentine, a humorous erotic paranormal romance

I have a double whoop this week!  Spank My Valentine, book 3 of "Tales of the Blakeney Sisters" is released from Red Rose Publishing!  And Book 1, Rub My Pumpkin, is now available on Fictionwise (and currently 15% off, so hurry!)

Spank My Valentinea humorous erotic paranormal romance
by Carolyn Gregg
Book 3 of "Tales of the Blakeney Sisters"
from Red Rose Publishing

Once upon a time, there lived a man with five rambunctious daughters. They were an average American farming family except for one minor detail. The man was a warlock, and all of his daughters were witchlets—half witch and half human.

Grant Morgan hasn’t been to Toppers Cove since he graduated from high school there. But when he receives the invitation to the Hearts on Fire Valentine’s Day Dance, and sees Sanderly Blakeney’s name listed on the committee, something inside him tells him to go back to his home town. If nothing more than to see her again, and to see if the flame he carried for her all through their years in school still burns.

Only one thing could possibly stand in his way. His parents are still prominent people in town, which means they know all about the Blakeneys. And they have made it very clear to their only child that he is not to have anything to do with any of "those heathen girls", especially Sandy.
"All right, cousin. I got it, and I’m holding it in my hand this very moment."

"Open it," Lena ordered him.

Grant sighed in exasperation. He had always been a pushover with it came to his cousin. In many ways, she was more like a sister, and had been an integral part of his life growing up, since he was an only child.

The envelope had the embossed logo of Toppers Cove CSD on the upper left-hand corner. The letter had originally been sent to him at his old mailing address. Grant could see where his mother had crossed it out and written the address of his New York apartment to have it forwarded.

Grabbing a letter opener from the pencil cup on his drawing table, he ripped open the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper. Even as he unfolded it, he could tell it was an invitation of some sort. His first impulse was to toss it without reading it first, until a name at the top caught his attention, right underneath Lena‘s name.

Sanderly Blakeney, Vice Chairman

Vice Chairman of what? He scanned the paper.

You are invited to attend the First Annual Hearts on Fire Valentines Day Dance at the Toppers Cove Consolidated High School gym on Friday, February 14th. The dance will be from 7 to midnight. Music will be provided by J.D. Maxx and the Maximums.

He glanced back up at the name at the top, and the first thing that he realized was that she was still a Blakeney. Sandy Blakeney. Either she hadn’t gotten married, or if she had, she’d taken her maiden name back. Either way it means she’s free.

Grant frowned. It was coming back to him, and it wasn’t pleasant. It had been years since he’d felt that deep sense of longing. It was immediately followed by sadness, disillusionment, and regret.

"Well?" Lena’s voice drifted from the speaker.

"Well what?"

"Are you coming or not?"

"I don’t know…"

"Oh, don’t give me that bullshit, Grant David! We’ve worked a lot of long, hard hours to get this thing together. Think of it as a class reunion, only with a lot more returning graduates!"

"I’ve never attended any of the class reunions," he reminded her.

"Like I don’t already know that," his cousin retorted. "Your folks are already expecting you to come up for a visit."

Oh, shit.


"Yeah. I’m still here. Let me think on it, Lena, and I’ll get back with you."

"No way, cuz. I know why you’re back-pedaling. It’s because of Sandy, isn’t it?"

Yes, Lena would bring her up, considering she was the only person in the world who knew of his history, or rather the lack of it, when it came to the Blakeney girl. As he tried to figure out a way to get out of the going to the dance, his cousin persisted.

"I told her I was inviting you."


"Hey, it’s been ten years! You don’t have to tell me you’re still carrying a torch around for her. Listen, bro…" Her voice softened. Lena never referred to him as brother unless she was speaking to him from the heart. Despite the fact that they were adults now, his closeness to Lena was his only strong familial bond, and she would forever hold an emotional attachment to him.

"When I told Sandy I was asking you to the dance, you would have sworn I’d sucker punched her. There’s something still there, Grant. When are you two going to finally have a heart-to-heart, and let bygones be bygones?"

"Lena, you know the answer to that."

"Because your folks don’t approve of her? What are you? Twelve? It’s time to grow some brass ones, bro. It’s your life, and what’s more important, your parents no longer have any say-so in it."

That was true. Since he got on with the company of his dreams, he had become totally independent of his parents, both physically and financially. Plus, truth be told, he was a bit homesick to see his home town again.

And Sanderly Blakeney.

Friday, January 28, 2011

Just in time for Valentine's Day

From this site:

Valentine's Day is for true romantics. For those that aren't afraid to say "Cute Butt", "I'm Easy", and "Bend Over". Romantic phrases like these are so sweet and gentle like red satin and rose petals. Wait a minute, what happened to the good old conversation Hearts? These Hearts have TROUBLE written all over!! Dozens of hilariously adult-themed phrases will send your Valentine into a Giggle coma. Be careful not to let the kids take these to school.. YIKES!

- Each pack contains 44 grams of candy.

Risque Sayings Include:

- Eat Me
- Cute Butt
- Let’s Scr*w
- Nice T*ts
- Be My Love Slave
- I’m H*rny
- Do Me
- Make Me Hot
- Bend Over
- Let’s Make Love
- Lick Me

*None of these are as graciously censored as they are here, so get ready for the wildest Valentine's ever.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Oh, yeah. All little girls want one - Not.

Seriously, who would buy something like this? I've heard of blow-up dolls, but you have to wonder about this company's target consumer.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Anatomical Problem?

For those of you who don't know, I've been dabbling in creating book covers.  I've been blessed to have my covers I've created for my "Tales of the Blakeney Sisters" series accepted by Red Rose Publishing for my books.

Anyway, I was going through some pictures and I found this one over at Shutterstock.  Is it me, or is there something strangely wrong with this woman's anatomy?

Monday, January 17, 2011

In Heat

I don't know where my friend got this, but she had to share it with me.
I'm glad she did.  (Thank you, Jeri!)

Thursday, January 13, 2011

The wait is over! Tickle My Candy Cane is now available!

The wait is over!

Now Available!

Tickle My Candy Cane
"Tales of the Blakeney Sisters, Book 2"
A humorous, erotic paranormal holiday romance
by Carolyn Gregg
from Red Rose Publishing

Once upon a time, there lived a man with five rambunctious daughters. They were an average American farming family except for one minor detail. The man was a warlock, and all of his daughters were witchlets—half witch and half human.

With Christmas two days away, Tamberly Blakeney has given up hope of finding her heart call that year. That is, until Jonathan Mauk walks into the market and into her life. With the magical swirl of a candy cane's stripes, she knows he’s the man meant to be her lifelong love. But first he has to pass the sex hex test, which she is sure won't be a problem.

What she doesn't realize is that there is something in Jonathan's past that deeply disturbs her father. And until Daddy gets all the answers, there could be hell to pay.

(Click here for an excerpt and to order.)

Sunday, January 2, 2011

More Bathroom Fun

As if going to the bathroom isn't traumatic enough for some people, can you imagine tending to your business at one of these?  (Gives a whole new meaning to the term "blow job" in my opinion!)

Found here, scroll down while you're over there to see the nun urinals.

That's right.  Nun urinals.